Tuesday, May 13, 2008

My fat, lying ass.

Right, so I haven't updated in awhile, mainly because my classes were killing me. Okay, far from it, but I have been besieged with horrible assignments which has taken up most of what putrid little time I have left. It's mostly Psych essays, and OMG how disgusting can they get. I told myself after the fiasco of last semester I would buckle down and WORK. But it's like the universe is always out to prove me wrong. Psych essays are SCIENCE essays. So basically you need tables, hypotheses, stats and no opinion of your own. I had to do TWO of those bastards. I know I sound angry when I whine like that, but now that that's over, we can move on.

I cannot tell you how strange my life here has been lately. But let's not talk about that. The point is, I really appreciate the emails and phone calls from my friends and family. You cannot even imagine how for a few moments in the day, my heart can feel so full. And how even the little things have helped me more than I can say. (And yet, I'm equally as sad as before. This sounds mathematically impossible I know, but my emotions have never been good at maths.)

Have I mentioned how boring a place Canberra is? No, I haven't changed my mind. But in a way, it leaves time for alot of other things. Like ktv competitions, basketball matches, WALKING to the movies. This place is growing on me. And so are some people. Sometimes I think there are two types of people in the world. The ones who should settle for what they have and learn to appreciate it, and the ones who shouldn't. And I had always egoistically classified myself in the latter. But lately, certain decisions I had made have indicated perhaps, I am as weak as I feared. I don't regret those decisions, because they were the best that I could have made at that point in time, but knowing what I know now, and continuing in that wrong direction is just plainly pathetic. I like Canberra, but occasionally the stillness of life here makes you obssess over the details.

A little happier, these days.